Sunday, March 31, 2013

tension for almost 2 hours !!!!!! grrrrrr... fine.. get over it !!!

dear crush.. the moment we start talking.. was the start of something beautiful.. the silent war that we had.. the time that we spent.. the road we've been through.. definitely was my greatest memories.. thanks thanks and thanks.. i'll be away for 1 month.. and i hope u will understand.. i need to be focused.. im done playing around with my feelings.. its sucks..

to the HANDSOME one !!! good luck praktikum !!!

Saturday, March 30, 2013

to the one and only who ALWAYS view my blog !!! thanks !!! proud to have a TALENTED person like u viewing my blog.. SERIOUSLY !! im PROUD and i mean it !! hahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaahha XD

ok.. im here.. in my campus.. this moment.. and its a god damn hot night !! like seriously.. messy room.. unpacked stuff.. gosh !! like hell.. someone pls help me clear all this stuff up !!!

*left this entry hanging for almost 1 hour just now.. on-call with my so-called best friend a.k.a miszannalieze*

ok.. lets continue.. ok. haven't unpack.. plus on with the multitasking me busying with this entry.. plus text messages.. plus whatsapp-ing.. plus fb comment.. plus fb chat.. plus eating.. plus listening to my favorite song.. really messy me !! but i love my style.. hahaha.. ok crap ! that's what i always do !!

hey you !! the HANDSOME and TALENTED one !! hahahahhahha... finish up your assignments k !! fighting !!

Thursday, March 28, 2013

8feb-17feb - CNY !!! ^_^
20feb - kem musical
22feb - merentas desa
25feb - BIG
1mac-3mac - betau
4mac - LGA staging
11mac-14mac - olahraga
1april - praktikum

oke... that is roughly a draft of my crazy timetable for the past few months.. it is listed on the 23rd january 2013.. 09.01am.. and turns out that i've finally come to the last bit of it.. and that's my PRAKTIKUM session !!!! gosh gosh gosh.. i can feel butterflies in my tummy now !!! waaaaa... nervous babe !!! huhuhu.. wonder how will it be on the first day.. during the observation.. don't dare to imagine it... huhuhu

oke winnie.. relax winnie.. think positive and everything will be fine.. :) *deep breath* oke.. im relax now.. going back there on friday?? hahahaha.. its not a joke ok.. im serious.. oke --' mindset !! where the hell are you now?? many things can be done ok.. you can make your full preparation for your schooling.. settle up your assignments quick.. need not be worried by rushing here and there on the monday.. ok !! let head back there now !!!!!! opppsss..over-reacted.. hahaha.. 

till now.. still cant believe that im already in sem5 this year.. its all happen too fast.. 1 and a half years to go.. fuuhhhh.. hope everything will be fine for the next 3 sem.. :)

Sunday, March 24, 2013

currently sitting in front of my desktop finishing my assignments.. what?? still with the assignments?? yeah... well i think i should thank those who are willing to faced the lecturers and postpone the due date.. or else we will all surely be like zombies on the last friday.. ahahha.. also.. being home alone for the second day.. what to do.. didnt have the urge to go out wondering around.. my brother is out of town busying with this schedule of squashy tournament.. didnt even have the change to spend time with him during this break.. all the best kiddo.. its ur last year in primary.. break a leg k !! :) my sister is busy with all her applications.. meeting the teachers.. asking around for scholarships.. blablabla.. normal.. i've been there.. mummy?? focusing on viivian's stuff... :) she should be... daddy?? as usual.. busy with his work.. no holiday expect fridays.... which lives me alone here.. right now.. this moment..

hmm... wonder what is going on in riau this time.. saw everything that they posted on FB.. quiet smooth so far.. hope that the they manage to adapt with the lighting and the audio system over there.. rehearse as much as u guys can.. adapt urself with the stage over there.. and perform well tonight !! always with u guys.. :))

having a little conflict with myself lately.. Crush.. it helps to motivate urself.. to be better.. day by day.. in order for him to have a good impression on you.. but the fact is that he dont even realize ur existence.. and that hurts... a lot !!! so now.. i tell myself.. be cool.. limit yourself.. he's not yours.. and will never be.. so just act normal.. remain the friendship.. rather than turning into strangers.. cz that will hurt u even more !! conclusion??  let it just remain what we have now.. not more.. not less.. trying to ignore what is in my mind now.. and focus on something more important.. live life to the fullest !! :)

#dream on.. it wont happen.. never..

Thursday, March 21, 2013


tonight is the last night im with them.. feel kinda sad though.. why not.. even they often get me on my nerves but still that's the memories between us.. the tears the laughter the talk the jokes.. that's priceless.. my friends asked me.. what u get from spending all night with them? dont you feel tired doing things that didnt bring any benifit to u? well.. i just manage to answer them with a smile:)) no doubt.. they are the reasons of my tense and stress.. but what i get from them is an opprtunity.. an opportunity for me to find the real me.. the opprtunity for me to create the other me.. the opportunity for me to become a new me.. i often think that i cant manage to handle all these bullshits before.. but now its all done !! small matter.. problems arise with the solutions behind.. it just the matter of finding the right one and solve it together.. that's what i get from spending all night with them.. :)) tired?? benifit?? one thing for sure.. i wont feel tired in doing things that i love.. oh yeah.. directing is just so not my type but theater.. its always a part of me ever since.. and i will put my 100% into it.. even its acting.. assisting.. directing.. or even just helping.. and since i still manage to complete my assignment on time even im in the mids of handling them.. i can just conclude that.. seriously.... i have a GOOD time management.. thats the benifit that i get !!! i found out my own strength... hehehehe.. ;)

guys... appreciate the road that you guys had been throuigh..make it worth it.. pay back all the hard work that you guys had gone through all these while.. its not hard being the best.. trust me.. i cant say much just now cause i know my limit.. u might be seeing me in tears then.. and i dont want that.. u guys have had enough from me.. and the only thing i want you guys to know is that i really appreciate each and every moment we spent together.. thanks for the cooperation that u guys had given me.. thanks a lot.. glad to be working with u guys.. :') i just hope that ayie can manage u guys well in riau.. give him ur fullest cooperation and make it a history.. u only have a chance to live once in life.. so make it great !! :))

nothing mush i guess.. didnt have the real time to continue emo-ing thinking about u guys.. assignments are still hangging half way.. shouting my name.. force me to finish it by today.. so i guess i'll just pen-off here.. ONE FOR ALL AND ALL FOR ONE !!! best of luck PRECAELS !! :D

#special thanks to kak ita for puting the trust in me.. appreciate that so much sis :)

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

From the bottom of my heart

This entry is decicated specially to my one and only.. Mummy.. Im really truly sorry mom.. I should have realize your good intention for me.. you always think for me but eventually i over-looked it.. I just brust it out to you without thinking about your feelings.. But still.. you just remain patience and forgive whatever happens.. I didn't even say "bye" before hangging up.. That's so rude of me.. Seriously I'm truly SORRY for what had happen.. I'm still acting childish after some times.. I dont know.. Maybe its because of my tense over here that makes me brust it out on you.. It shouldnt be that way !!! I should have to manage my feelings well.. Especially to you...

Mummy.. Im actually facing lots of problems over here.. and I have no one to share with.. I really wish that I can share it with you.. Just that I didnt manage to find the right time.. When we seems that all those problems just fly away from my mind.. I feel a sense of relief when talking to you.. Which makes me not to bring up any issues in my mind.. I just wanna remain that way.. The sense of relief when im with you.. I love you mom... Seriously.. I seldom say that to you lately.. I realize that.. But thats the fact..

I love you.. Im sorry.. Thank you.. These three phrases that you thought me since im young.. It will always be my magic words throughout my life time.. :)

Mummy.. I really really miss you NOW.... Just feel like hugging you and never let go.... Miss you mom.. SERIOUSLY !!!! :'(

#free free kene chop sombong tadi.. padan muke ko winnie.. tulaa lain kali senyum.. berusaha untuk fake-kan diri !!!!

Saturday, March 9, 2013


First of all.. Thanks Anis for lending me her lappy for A WHILE... #a while only oke winnie.. so u better be quick !! Haha.. ok ok !! Thanks again.. Love you Anis.. :)

Its been a hectic semester for me.. starting from the day i accept the challenge to lead my group of junior with their theater "Sleeping Beauty and the Beast". Sincerely.. i didn't have the guts to say NO cause they really need someone to help them around.. And to me, this maybe would be the right time i start to try out something new.. something that i've never done before.. "Directing"

Things get worse.. Problems occur.. Tense and stress often accompany me in my sleep.. Woke up the next day feeling fresh for just A WHILE and then start on with those problems again.. My senior once told me.. Don't take it as a problem.. but face it as a challenge.. Ok fine.. That's my choice so that's my challenge . for me to be stronger.. for me to be wiser.. and YES !! I am now.. #I suppose.. Hehehe..

Also thanks to him.. who is willing to hear all my problems from the start.. I owe you A LOT dude.. Thanks.. Thanks.. and Thanks.. He's the one who make me feel a lot better when i'm in the mid's of problems.. He's the one who gives me solutions to face it.. Arrrgghhh.. I don't know how to pay it other then thousands and millions of THANK YOU..........

To "Him".. pls don't have any awkward feelings if im willing to do anything for you.. pls don't make it as a big deal.. Cause you have done your part as a friends by helping me out.. and it's my time to repay you back by doing my part as a friend.. in helping you out.. in any situations.. Cause that's what friends are for..

Hope that everything will go according to my plan.. and also hope that THEY will give their full cooperation until the end !! Go PRECAELS !! You guys can do it !! :)