Saturday, November 3, 2012

when fingers are guided by instinct

ok. what? dont just look at me like that. i didnt even start yet. ok i know.. yeah.. right.. oh yeah?? fine! sulk! that's all u know!

dear bloggie.. i've been like really away from you for a seriously god damn long long ago in a kingdom far far away there live a beautiful prin%$@&#% #slap !! hello !! get back to our business here.. get rid of the cloud above your head winnie !! blurghhh.. ok. its like a hell yeah useless lifeless and meaningless life there (facebook) scrolling the page up and down for about the whole hour in front of the lappy and the next thing you know the world just keep spinning really fast.. not waiting for anyone and there goes my day.. but still keep on repeating the same routine over and over again.. boring? sure do! but hei! im stubborn! yeah.. regret! that's the best word. it would be better still if i had spend a little time on you everyday at least to express how i feel everyday.. keeping it from memory to memories and smile whenever i get time to read it back. #sigh. im just not mature enough as an elder in the family.. bet my parents gonna be disappointed if they know what am i up to everyday.

what a lucky spoiled brat i am.. wake up at when the sun strikes my butt! last minute work always awaits! not to mention my revison for my finals! loads of movies while the next paper is on??? tomorrow morning !! check on my watch owh great only 4 hours left to rest my mind.. time management sucks! spending time with those unnecessary! screaming out "arrgghh im tension" when every little problem of mine is just because of me! owh how i miss my days with them! i love busy days! at least i know that im not sitting around doing nothing! busy days with the one i care doing the things i love.. i miss those day like seriously dude !! my night is now empty! wish that everyday ends quickly now! no...please don't !! i don't mean end.. just.. hope that time won't flies fast like.. how it suppose to be.. you just don't get it !! i didn't mean to fight what's beyond me i just want my life back !! the time.. on that spot.. where i used to scream whenever i get stressed out.. the time.. on that spot.. where i used to be the other me.. the time.. on that spot.. where i found the real me.. the time.. on that spot.. where i am me.. yes. the time.. when everything was like...........nothing now.

living a life as a bad thinker.. thinks that everyone have bad thoughts about me.. they are the one.. change my perception! i am me when im with them! and finally i found me in my real world and that makes me get attached to them.. thus it makes me sad.. real sad to be apart from them. yes. we can stand independently without them but it won't be the same. the time.. on that spot.. won't be the same.. the way i scream.. won't be the same.. the other me.. won't be the same.. the real me.. i hope it stays.. real. i know i can't.. i can't get back.. just.. hoping that it will be the same.. really hoping...............

generations? i hope we find them.. those who are willing.. not help us by just barely "helping" but help us "sincerely". the talent.. it burns in everyone of you.. why prefer to look through it as though you have nothing.. keep it burns make it flames cherish your every moment with different experience as life is too a stage where every man and women on it are actor. you are already one of them.. so fight for the best.. the best in you.......

also..some words for myself.. reminder.. wake up.. when it haven't ends.. cherish !!

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